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What would you do for someone you love?

The answer to that question for most people is “anything they need,” whether it be providing emotional, physical or financial support. It’s the latter fraudsters are interested in.

This is the last of a three-part series on consumer scams. This article reveals the dark truth about the romance scam – fraudsters seeking to build trust and isolate potential victims, hoping to fake a strong emotional connection.

Hard to Meet People

Finding a true romantic connection is hard for most people. This effort only becomes more challenging as people age. There are fewer social spots for seniors to congregate and there can be reluctance in even getting out of the home in general.

Among its many uses, the internet offers the opportunity to find a special someone from the comfort of home. No awkward social settings, just go to a website and a person can have access to available seniors across the world.

Long distance romances – conducted virtually through email and video conferencing – have advantages, but also a have some risks lurking in the shadows. 

Stories of romance scams have long been reported to financial institutions, but the frequency of these incidents has been rising rapidly over the last 18 months. Details may vary but there are common elements that victims of the scams have acknowledged.

• The relationship is initiated online and remains long distance throughout the duration. The target may have virtual interaction through some form of video conferencing, but never meets the scammer in person. 
• The length of the “relationship” will vary, with some scammers asking for money within two or three months and others communicating with the target for close to a year before making requests.
• The scammers present themselves in a way that heightens their attractiveness. Sometimes they only send still pictures (never providing any live interaction), often of a person with model-worthy looks. This can include a backstory where the scammer represents themselves as a former professional athlete or having experience as a model or actor. In other instances, the scammer represents themselves as a person with considerable financial wealth, hoping to find someone to spend it on.
• However long is required, scammers build trust and affection with their targets. The ultimate culmination of that ongoing, virtual relationship is a long-distance proposal. If the scammer has done their job, the target is emotionally committed. That commitment is what the scammer will use to their advantage.
• Many targets do not have great wealth. However, the scammers have spent their time during conversations gathering information on what is available. Mortgage-free houses or healthy 401(k) accounts are what scammers are really attracted to.
• When a target does accept a proposal, the planning begins, or so it would seem. The wedding planning does start, such as who to invite and where to honeymoon. But for the scammer, the planning began when they confirmed the target had cash available or assets that could be converted.
• When there is a wedding proposal and acceptance, the scammers hesitate on a wedding date. They will unite with the target – their supposed true love – pending an ability to pay a debt that is keeping them stuck in the foreign country they currently reside. Or they share with the target – now fiancée (“target-fiancée”) – that they would be truly happy if their family could attend the wedding in the U.S., if only their cash-flow problem was preventing them from being able to pay for the travel. The specific story varies, but the underlying point is always the same: If the target-fiancée wants the wedding to occur, they must assist the scammer in some financial way before that big day.

Evil In Their Hearts

If an individual is in love, why would they even hesitate to provide money to their love interest, particularly when that person is in need?

The problem that’s revealed time and again when it comes to romance scams is that the scammer does not share any love for the target-fiancée. Beyond the emotional leverage that the scammer can employ against the victim, they also use the same techniques that are used in other types of fraud schemes.

They build trust in the relationship. Then, they convince the victim to cut out friends and family from decision making and keep those people in the dark as to any financial support being provided. This isolation allows the fraudster-fiancée to ask the victim to do things they would never consider under other circumstances. They include such things as: 

• “Can you refinance your house and send me the proceeds?”
• “Can you share with me your bank account information so that I can transfer my money to you?”
• “Can you open a bank account in your name for me and deposit checks I send you and withdraw monies at my direction?”

These are just a sample of reported incidents where targets have been manipulated. Ultimately, the loss that comes when the scammer has drained the target dry is probably the cruelest of any form of scam. Money is lost – as with all scams, of course – but there also remains the deep and painful heartbreak for the target-fiancée.

Don’t fall for this trap! Trust is broken, money is gone, and dreams are crushed. It’s a truly scary proposition.